We understand there are times when relationships between schools and parents become stressed and communication about a child with learning challenges becomes more difficult. We offer advice and practical input in this situation in an objective and pragmatic manner.
We recently worked with family whose child attended a school for specific learning difficulties and was not making progress within a specialist learning environment. The relationship between home and schools was fraught with anxiety. We spent time with both the family and the educational professionals working out what the child’s evolving learning needs were, how to address those needs and how to assess progress or its lack. We were able to empower both sides to put the relationship back on track and to re focus on meeting the child’s learning needs.
Parents approached us with niggling worries. Their daughter seemed very bright but was not really making progress at school. The school told them that she was struggling and seemed very frustrated. She was becoming very moody and would have rages that felt like toddler tantrums. We guided them through the process of an Educational Psychologist assessment and its implications. She was diagnosed with Specific Learning difficulties and specific issues with short term memory and processing speeds. By understanding what the child had to deal with on a day to day basis in school and acting on the advice given, the parents and school were able to recognise her needs, make provision for them and put in the necessary support. She is now accessing the curriculum at her individual level. Her confidence has increased and the toxic fights over homework are no longer.
Parents were faced with were endless complaints from school about their son’s behaviour, focus and ability to pay attention. He got up and moved around the classroom a lot, and was endlessly fiddling with things. As a result he was not accessing the curriculum and it became a vicious circle. His parents thought he was “just a boy” who needed more exercise and signed him up for more after school sport. He loved computers and TV and he could give them his whole attention and focus. He was a very determined little boy when he wanted something. His school reports became more and more negative and his mother came to us at her wits end. We looked closely at what was going on and what the boy was dealing with. Further investigation revealed that he had ADHD which explained why he found it very difficult to concentrate for longer than a short period. He had become very difficult at home and was sometimes “off the wall” with his constant energetic movement. In consultation with the school he now has movement breaks to fit his learning style, he has some individual support from a teaching assistant and he has more pastoral support. HIs parents are consulting a Child and Adolescent Psychiatrist and considering the use of ADHD medication for him. We continue to support them and in due course may consider a school move.
An only child raised in a bilingual household was not making much progress with his speaking. Everyone said it was because he was exposed to two languages all the time and that he would just speak later and fluently. His parents were worried but as he was their first child they didn’t know anything different. Once he started nursery he didn’t interact with the other children. He didn’t understand their games and did not want to join in. He seemed happier organising the trains into orderly lines. He spoke very little and would take the adults by the hand and lead them to what he wanted. He became very upset when they were unable to understand what he wanted. His anxious parents were very confused about what to do. We worked together to build a profile of the little boy and supported them through pre and post diagnosis. He was diagnosed with ASD just after his 4th birthday. We helped his parents to access support from their Local Authority. He is now at a mainstream primary school with 1:1 support for his social interaction and communication. He has weekly speech therapy outside school and has recently overcome his fear of water and is learning to swim. We continue to support the family with SEN strategy for their son.
Parents of an adopted child in a mainstream school came to us in despair about the trouble their son was getting in to at school and how little the school were doing to support and understand him. They felt that his early life experiences impacted on his ability to learn and behave at school and that the school were becoming hostile towards their son.
We stepped in to support better communication between home and school by helping the parents to explain and explore the issues that their son was dealing with. We attended meetings with the parents and helped to moderate the meeting and oversee its outcome. By clarifying the son’s profile of learning and support needs with the help of an independent professional we were able to encourage a more collaborative approach between school and home. Their son is now much more settled and better supported at school and is starting to make progress.
We regularly advise on changes of school placement because with the best will in the world there are times when a child with learning differences is not in the right school to meet their needs.
In a recent case the child’s needs had changed as his learning difficulties became more apparent. The school felt that they could no longer meet his needs. As the parents did not agree with the school relationships had become very strained. We stepped in to clarify and summarise the boys’ key learning needs and worked with the parents to find him a new school that would support his needs. By identifying and engaging with a new school the boy will have a managed move which is being co-operatively handled by everyone involved.
ALISON POPE – EMPOWERING PARENTS OF CHILDREN WHO LEARN DIFFERENTLY
